Still Happy After all These Years

I had been avoiding making a blog like this for some time.  Not because I didn't need a place to vent, share and record my pain/treatment- I did! But I didn't want to come across as a Wendy Winer, a woe-is-me, lets throw a pity party kinda girl.  I am happy!  I really am a positive person.  Anyone living with chronic pain will tell you that they keep most of their daily pain levels inside and try to push through the pain.  No one wants to live bedridden, missing out on all the fun, or to be known as The Girl With The Headache (or fibro, RA, etc.  fill in the blank with your own chronic illness).

I have two amazing children and the most loving and understanding husband.  I would give anything for them!  And so I do just that.  I push, and push, and push my way through the day.  I don't want to miss out on a single thing that my family has to offer.  I love my life- all except the head pain and neurological disorder of course.  But it is a part of me now.  Like I said in my first post- it is my new normal.  These illnesses have no "cure".  Yet.  I am still remaining hopeful.  So now I just need to find the best way to deal with it.  Just ignoring it and shoving inside my own head isn't going to work anymore.  I think my head has enough to deal with now!  So I need to come to full terms with my chronic illness, not be ashamed of it; embarrassed to share that side of me anymore.

So on one hand I wish my family and friends could really and fully understand what it is like in my shoes. What my pain is like, what I deal with on a daily basis. How this isn't "just a headache". But on the other hand I find I have a hard time talking to them about it.  I try so hard to have a "normal life" and not let my pain rule my life that so many just have no idea.  But I need to Woman-Up!  This blog is my first step.

Baby steps, right?